UCD Neurosurgeon diagnosed with Prion’s disease - The Harpy

Professor Gemima Doherty, Head of the department of alternative Neurosurgery in UCD, has been diagnosed with Prion’s disease, The Harpy has learned.

Professor Doherty first contracted the disease while carrying out a disciplinary trepan on a student for citing a peer reviewed study in an assignment on vaccination efficacy. 

When interviewed about how the condition has affected her life, Doherty stated that it has made her immune to Covid-19 and 5G, adding that “The globalists can’t block the Natural Law hyperwave signals that the universe has been broadcasting into my genius professor brain anymore”. It is understood that Professor Doherty will not be seeking treatment for the condition.

Professor Doherty first showed symptoms of the disease when she ran as a National Party candidate in the 2019 local elections, on a platform of opposition to immigration, 5G, vaccines, peer review, and the concept of physical reality. When asked about Professor Doherty’s future in UCD, a representative of the University stated “That mad bitch? She killed and ate the last person who tried to give her a P45, so we’re staying away”.