Top five… snacks to eat after a heavy night out

As the academic year progresses, the necessity of diligent study will become clear. However, this sharp realisation will most definitely be outweighed by the obvious advantages of an active social life for a few more months. Here's Kevin Mulligan's shortlist of food to keep the modern student half-awake in lectures and always up for a night out.1 - Leftover TakeawayLeftovers, the cream of the crop... well, not really, but certainly necessary for survival. Picture living with a final year architecture student (hermit) and one of those odd people with a gym membership. 4am raids on their food press will yield little but jars of ‘instant muscle mass’ and 32-ounce coffee sachets. Disaster! This is where those lonely pieces of rice floating in three-day-old black bean sauce with a few soggy peppers for garnish become utterly appetising.2 - ToastSimple, effective, and won’t cause any adverse reactions when mixed with what has come beforehand in the night. Can be dipped in tea to form a delicious, sloppy concoction.3 - PastaAn instant carb load is a stalwart of the post-night-out recovery – and when mixed with bolognaise sauce, the results are delicious. However, it is also fraught with danger, and too many men (better than the author) have tried and failed to cook even the simplest of dishes after a heavy night on the town. Things can go very wrong, very quickly: water boils over, saucepan boils dry, pasta fries to the brink of combustion while saucepan warps under the pressure of intense heat. An inattentive drunkard and a gas hob simply don’t mix, so cook with caution.4 - Traditional FryIf boiling pasta is a risk, then frying anything is a liability. That said, the traditional fry is well worth its place on this list for its lucid simplicity. A heavy night out can lead to a lot of confusion and head pains when you return home; a fry is often the last bastion of clarity (before you pass out on the floor looking for a stray sausage, that is). Unfortunately, risk often outweighs reward, and the idea is abandoned. This is usually the cause of one too many ‘waking up the entire apartment block by blitzing your sausage and rasher for God knows how long, in God knows how much butter’ fire alarm misadventures.5 - PancakesBottom of the pile. Nothing like this should ever be tried, unless you enjoy waking up slumped over a mixing bowl – covered in a sticky mess of flour and eggs.