Mystic Mittens: Vol. XXVII Issue 3

November 2nd - November 30th


Things may be looking a bit bleak at the minute, dear Cap. Remember that taking vengeance on that poor old woman who took the last pack of salt and vinegar Pringles in Supervalu isn't the answer. Remember who you are. 


You have been very productive this week. Don’t let that production slip as you embark on your new journey as a fitness YouTuber. 


You've been in many fights recently, my strong headed Pisces. Why not just play dumb for the first time in your life, and let the under dog win. 


The stars are aligned for you this season, Aries. Your self-awareness has sky-rocketed, and you realise that maybe you should stick to the Sure deodorant, and not the eco-natural one.  


You’ve been more sporadic than usual as of late. Maybe purchasing that 10 euro cat muzzle off of Wish for your friend who recently parted with Poppins, was a tad distasteful. Reel it in.  


The last week in November, you will be greeted by a familiar face. Perhaps taking care of your recently neglected eyebrows is a good idea, in preparation for this long-lost stranger. 


This watery season begs for some trial and errors my friend, particularly on the dating scene. But remember what and who you came here to do, Cancer. 


Great things come in fours for you Leo. Maybe the fourth DairyMilk Golden Crisp will have the answers.  


You may have thought picking up singing over this lockdown was a good idea. You sound like a flat Pierce Brosnan. Give it a rest Virgo, your flat mate will thank Mystic Mittens for this. 


Your nurturing nature escapes you yet again Libra, as plant number forty-three wilts away. Look on the brightside! Your compost heap is thriving! 


It's Scorpio season and your face mask is slipping. You’ve been hiding your emotions like a drunken college student in the Workman’s queue. Quit the antics, and embrace who you are!


You’re burning your mother’s Penney’s Autumn Winds candle at both ends. Chill out and breath. You’re a fire hazard, and it'll burn down the house!