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Originally published in Volume III, Issue 12 on 27th May 1997 by Observer Reporters.

 

A heated debate over the rights and wrongs of evolutionary theory has blown up over a stunning decision by the UCD Animal Development Department to make the teaching of Creationism a requirement for both lecturers and tutors.

The controversial theory states that the species of the world were created according to those facts laid down in the Bible, and not, as posited by Charles Darwin, by the natural selection of the species.

It is a theory that has gained renewed scientific acceptance after years in the academic wilderness. In the US, certain states such as Oklahoma, have ruled that school biology textbooks must mention that while Darwin’s theory of evolution is taught, there are theories, such as Creationism, which could provide the answer to how life on Earth developed.

The move by UCD comes after heavy pressure from the Catholic Church, who feel that students are having their morality undermined by scientific teachings. All lecturers and tutors will be required to teach first year biology students at least one class in Creationist theory before continuing with standard Darwinist ideas.

While the Animal department have refused to comment on this move, UCD academic community at large, with one senior lecturer describing it as the “biggest step backward in the history of this great university.” Another called for an urgent rethink of the situation, claiming that it could damage the reputation of the college worldwide.

However, the move has been welcomed by Mr. Michael Jackson, head of the Irish Flat Earth Society. “It’s a victory for truth and justice. It is great that students will learn the truth of how God’s great gift to came about.”

The University Observer has learnt that a review of the situation has been promised over the summer break.

 

*This article was a satirical piece published in the final issue of Volume III. 

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