Originally published in Volume IV, Issue 4 on 14th November by Observer Reporters.

 

It has emerged that not a single make student has attended the UCD “Wellman Clinic” since its launch in the college three months ago. Dr. Ian O’Grady, of the Health Centre, has blamed the complacency and shyness of the Irish make for the clinic’s “zero uptake.”

The clinic offers advice on any area of male health including testicular cancer, drugs, and sexual problems. Dr. O’Grady points out that despite the relative prevalence of testicular cancer in twenty-something males, “Irish fellas tend to be very blase about their health.” He continues, “male students should be their testicles every six months and familiarising themselves with the testicle’s basic shape.”

Also offered is advice on and treatment of sexually transmitted diseases. According to Dr. O’Grady, “you do see a good bit of it in UCD – mostly genital herpes and non-specific urethritus.” In addition, the services will deal with male sexual difficulties such as impotence and premature ejaculation.

According to Dr. O’Grady, seemingly basic issues of sex education still need to be hammered home in UCD: “It’s phenomenal – people still have to realise that having sex can make you pregnant. Girls are much more promiscuous that they used to be. It’s amazing how many girls go out to the Bar on Thursday night and end up sleeping with someone the just met. Then they arrive down here the next morning looking for the morning-after pill.”

On the issue of drugs, Dr. O’Grady claims to have “no magic solutions”. He says, “if you come to me saying you take ecstasy, I’m not going to tell you it makes you a drug addict. But of those who do, a certain percentage will end up addicts…All I’m saying is if you ‘re going to do it, do it sensibly.”