The Badger allows us a rare insight in to the mind of a sports addict
The other day, The Badger was asked why he, a badger, knows so much about sport. The Badger hopes that if any of you ever meet a talking animal, you will use your first question for something much more profound.
Nevertheless, the human had a point. The true answer is something many of you reading this may suffer from, but, like an Arts student who actually goes to lectures, you are living in denial.
The Badger is a sports addict. It’s true. The Badger recently came to this revelation when he found himself watching some Canadian football at 3am one night. The Badger is not proud of what he did, and apologises to those he hurt, but he wants you to remember that he has hurt himself the most.
They say the first step to overcoming an addiction is admitting it, but The Badger disagrees. The Badger is a firm believer in the fact that the first step is getting the addiction in the first place.
The Badger first experimented with sport back during the summer of 1990. Jack Charlton’s Ireland were drawing every game at Italia ’90, and there was magic in the air. Sport was the cool thing to do, and everyone was doing it.
The Badger was drawn in by the bright lights, but it was David O’Leary’s penalty against Romania that truly had him hooked. The Badger had never cried from happiness in his life before that moment.
The 90s were a blur of World Cups, All-Ireland finals and the Michelle Smith situation. At the turn of the millennium, harder sports became the norm. The Badger found himself regularly engaging in rugby, and even experimenting with formula 1 and snooker. The Badger needed a fix, and didn’t care where it came from.
The rise of the internet, and Sky Sports, only made things worse. Suddenly the American sports were on the menu. Basketball, American football and even ice hockey became regular sources of sport for The Badger.
Throughout all this, The Badger has at least maintained a shred of self-respect, and can at least say that he has stayed away from NASCAR. Not even The Badger is desperate enough to watch 500 laps of an oval for a fix.
The Badger knows some of you are afraid that this is a letter of resignation from The Badger. You may rest easy, this is the complete opposite. The Badger wants you all to feel safe in the knowledge that The Badger will continue to fill these pages with the opinions you all hold so dear.