Twats of the Fortnight


Michelle McCormick keeps you in the know about all of Twitter’s celebrity folk

@lindsaylohan going to a meeting for a film i’m producing and possibly starring/co-starring in* talk to everyone later :) xoxo

This tweet was on March 30th. So here’s hoping that Lilo is in some alternate dimension where she’s two days ahead of everyone else on teh planet and this is an April Fools. God knows we don’t need another film with her in it. Go, be free Lohan – Mean Girls is enough of a contribution to the world.

@daraobriain Ugh. Some one has just sent me slashfic porn of me and @MrEdByrne. my eyes! my eyes! Why did they have to look?

There are those who think Ed Byrne and Dara O’Briain are sexy, funny men – but mother of divine jaysus, what sick mind would come up with such a pairing? My brain is diseased just thinking about it.

@MrEdByrne I hate you all. You’re all dicks.

Obviously Ed has read the slashfic porn too.

@ladygaga What mayhem in Melbourne tonight. Some kids just understand what it means live your eyeliner, breathe your lipstick, and kill for eachother.

Perhaps that jail stint in the Telephone video isn’t too far from reality. However, breathing ones lipstick would result in some fairly serious choking episodes methinks. Safety first, Gaga. Safety first.

@sesamestreet Cookie Monster: Uh-oh. Sugar rush kicking in. ME GOING GRAZY! ME GOING CRAZY! ME GOING CRAZY!

Now that Sesame Street is no longer gracing our terrestrial TV screens, it’s good to get a daily dose of muppetry from Twitter instead. Hate to say it Cookie Monster, but we could have told you about the sugar rush.

@boscosbox God I never told you, I really like Jedward, do you think I could do my hair like theirs?

Two Irish legends unite. Bosco… and Jedward. Leaving aside the horrific image of lovely little Bosco with Jedward hair, it’s awesome that everyone’s favourite box-dweller is now on Twitter. Get your daily dose of “Hello boys and girls” here.